I am Open

Posted on December 18, 2015

My word this year was Open. As in, I am Open. Open heart, open mind, open to ideas, abundance, blessings… ridicule, judgement, criticism? Being open is a tall order. Keeping an open mind and heart is not always easy for sensitive types like me. Sometimes I wonder, why did I sign up for this? Why the big quest? Why couldn’t I just be one of those people who gets up, goes to work at the office and then comes home and watches Grey’s Anatomy on the couch, or whatever. Do people still watch Grey’s Anatomy?

I think if I am to progress on this journey, and I am on a journey, then I must be Open and take risks. Most of the time when I am brave enough to do this people will come to me and say they thought they were the only ones who felt this way. Being open means making connections. But being empathic, I have to connect carefully. I have finally learned (finally!) that I am prone to accidentally sucking up other people’s emotions and negative vibrations. I can now hear what you have to say, share my thoughts and feelings in a way I hope leaves you relieved, happy, at peace or inspired, and then after parting ways, merrily go on with my life. Without having to lie down afterward. Without getting a “people hangover”.

Only an open heart will allow you to float equally between everyone.

~Mitch Albom

People have been opening up to me since I was a little girl. I always thought this meant I was a good listener, and I am, but, big BUT, I never knew what to do with all the stuff they dumped on me. I have been hearing the following phrases my entire life: “You’re such a good listener.” “I always feel so much better after I talk to you.” “How do you always stay so positive?”. These things are all true, but many times I would arrive home physically depleted, emotionally drained, totally exhausted and sometimes plain old miserable. It sucked.

If I am going to continue being Open I’m going to need to put on my shields so I don’t spend my life soaking up up other people’s “feel-bads” as I call them. Recently I saw a cute graphic on Pinterest that said “Please be responsible for the energy you bring into this space” and I thought, hey yeah! can I wear this on my head?

To learn new things one has to be open and vulnerable.

~Jayesh Varma

In the meantime, however, I will stay Open. There’s only a few days left in this year and soon I will receive my 2016 word. But Open has been good to me. So many exciting possibilities and changes lie ahead of me. It truly is amazing what one receives, if only we are Open.